Weigh In!

Just a quick post to follow up on this weekend's weigh in! It wasn't exactly where I wanted, but I will take it for sure! I had a night at work that I worked all night until about 5 in the morning, got an hour of sleep, then got up for the day. Those days... I don't eat so well. So last weigh in was 267, and this weekend I weighed in at 263.6! Woohoo! 39 lbs total! Here are a couple pics.

Hoping to get into the 250s this week! Wish me luck! We will be going camping on Thursday until Saturday morning, so I will probably do weigh in the following morning to be consistent with time, we will see how early we get back! :)

Biking!

As promised- biking today! I was so excited and nervous about the ride and if I would be able to complete the feat or if it would be something I would have to ask for help and couldn't do, I didn't get much sleep last night!

My friend Stacey picked me up about 8 this morning and we set out to the route we had been informed was the 10 mile route for the event Spinderella. Spinderella is a bike event held in June and I wanted to see if I should sign up for the 10 or 22 mile.

It started out HARD! I was SLOW and my thighs BURNED SO BAD from the beginning. I was wondering what I was getting myself into if I barely got a block and I was feeling it already. Stacey told me to pull over and let me know my rear tire was low. I wasn't so sure if it was low or I was just a bit chubby and it made it look low :). We took our before picture-

We kept going, but I was starting to hurt pretty bad and was sure we had MAYBE only done about a mile. Girl got my back and said we should pull into a gas station that was on the way. Lucky us- Free Air. I filled my tire and GOODNESS- WHAT A DIFFERENCE!!!!! I felt so light and easier! 

We stopped a couple time for water and the view was wonderful. Here is our middle picture-

This is right before what I felt would be the hardest part of our journey. I had been warned about some specific hills and thought the last half would be a lot harder because of the hills. Can I tell you how exhilarating and great it feels when you push through something hard? I think every time I do a work out, there is the point I want to quit. This point I don't think I have anything left in me and I am DONE. Then if I just keep pushing, you get a RUSH of endorphins and it becomes easier and better and such a satisfying feel good feel!

The second half of our ride was my favorite by far. Speed, rush and yes... the hills weren't even bad! One point I got to the top of the hill and yelled up at Stacey- I DID IT! There was an older gentleman jogging and I was informed he chuckled at my excitement. Things are so much better when you have someone else to help push you through, and encourage, and share in your joy of getting your chubby but up a hill on a bike. :)

Excited to do it again soon! Here is our finished pic- 5 and 5 make ten today! Yup! We both did the ten miles and it felt GREAT!

So my FitBit doesn't track steps when I'm riding a bike and I was so lifted I decided to go for a walk/jog too! I got in another five miles and finished my steps. Nailing it today! I'm still under on my calories, and doing good! I took a little nap this afternoon and woke up a little stiff! Cross your fingers I can MOVE the next couple days! Hurts so good!

Are you all doing positive things for you??

Let's Play Catch!

So friends, I decided that this not in real time posting is not working for me! I've found that I am not caring as much and thinking my weigh ins don't matter right now! Darn it! In other words- I'm in a funk and it's time to mix it up! So that being said- This post is going to catch us up to current day. I will weigh in again in one week and kinda start over. I'll be honest- this funk has lasted at least a month! Yikes! So here you have it- all of my weigh ins with pics that I have up to current day! Hoping this real time will add some much needed pressure and once a week weigh ins so I can start making larger leaps again!

3rd Weigh In:
12/19/14 Weight: 283.8

This week was a MAJOR heart break. I actually cried after weighing in. It did not feel good. I stayed under calories by a LARGE amount and exercised MORE than committed and lost WAY LESS than expected. Just goes to show, sometimes over doing is harmful to your body. 

4th Weigh In:

1/2/15 Weight: 276

Notice my new bracelet? I got a fit bit for Christmas! It is great! Love it!

5th Weigh In:

Weight 272.4

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Seems like I have a good one then a not so good one, right? I have a hard time adjusting to not using food as a method of relieving stress, and I have a lot of stress at times! Darn it! Working on it! What do you do as a healthy way to relieve stress?

6th Weigh In:

Weight 265.8 

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Sometimes what seems slow is actually huge leaps! Can you believe I'm SO CLOSE to a 40lb loss!

7th Weigh In:

2/13/15

Weight 265

I feel like I'm starting to see some changes! This is really when the struggle started for me though. Notice it is not even a whole pound loss in the two weeks. Then my next one two weeks later was actually a two pound GAIN. That brings us up to date. I was due for a weigh in today and I don't feel like I've done great. I don't want to be putting myself in the dumps about bad decisions, but look forward to good ones- so I did not weigh today. I will next week and post then.

Back to the changes- I thought my back was quite a difference from the beginning to now. First pic is first day at 302 and second at 265. What do you think?

Little less of the flab and a little more definition on the back of my neck/shoulders, right? Or is this in my head?

I'm super excited to post things as I do them and share them when they happen and keep it fresh! I will add in a few things from the past I didn't get the chance to post that I wanted, but here's to keeping up to date!

Tomorrow I am going on a TEN MILE bike ride! This is my first long ride! Can't wait to share pictures and how THAT goes! Cross your fingers for me!

Blacktop is Colorful and Unique, and So Are You!

I have a lot of time to think when I go walking and running. I really like to take things around me and figure out how I can apply it to my life and the circumstances around me to see what I can take and learn from the situation.

This is a picture of one of my favorite places to walk and run.

It's a pretty and large park with a blacktop path around it, surrounded by trees and a huge grass field in the middle. Nothing extraordinary, just plain ugly blacktop I walk on, right?

The other morning I was walking and the wind made the cold just a bit more bitter and chilling. I had my face down trying to shield myself from the cold and found myself staring at the black top. So often people just see it as one large roadway of black. Not anything beautiful by any means, but when I took a moment to look a little closer, this is what I found.

 Blacktop is made up of some pretty PRETTY stuff! There are pink rocks, shiny rocks, smooth, sharp, small, larger- some even sparkle when the sun hits it just right. 

So here is the comparison. I think so often we think of the world like the blacktop. There are millions of people on it and we are just another person (or just a little rock in a piece of blacktop). I am here to tell you, take a closer look at yourself! You are not JUST another person, let alone just another FAT person! You are unique and beautiful! All of us make up the world full of people, but each rock piece making up blacktop means something, as do you! 

I find that others generalize and stereotype people way too much. Often we hear about the gender or racial stereotyping, but not a lot of people talk about the stereotyping of people that are overweight. Some of my favorites include fat people being lazy, or fat people aren't as intelligent and are spoken to with arrogance. Or of course my favorite when people assume that because another is overweight, they are incapable. Everyone is made up of the same stuff. We have hearts, and souls, and minds. We are unique and we are beautiful in our own ways.  

This road I walk on, I see all sorts of people. Yesterday, for example, I was there for hours. I saw older people do a lap, or young and fit people go for a little bit. I saw males and females. Some were faster than myself, some were slower. I don't think what mattered was the speed or how long we went (though I must say I didn't leave with another person still going, everyone I saw came and left and I was still trudging on jamming to my music!), what mattered was that we were all there. We were all trying to gain something for ourselves by being there. Not everyone goes to lose weight, or stay fit, some just enjoy the alone time and the feeling they get being at one with nature for a few minutes. Some like the fresh air and vitamin D from the sun.  Some are on a journey like myself. I can never decide if I should call this a journey or a a "move"ment. Haha!

The point is, and to sum it up- don't feel like you blend in and don't matter. Your story, your body, your personality.. . YOU.. are beautiful, unique, and colorful. It is ultimately your decision if you sparkle in the sun or are viewed as an ugly piece of blacktop. What have you done for yourself lately to feel that desire deep in your chest be able to come out and bloom? My friends, I tell you- we are worth it!

2nd Weigh-In

Starting a weight loss journey the week of Thanksgiving is not for everyone, that's for sure! I was SO NERVOUS for the next weigh in!

We had Thanksgiving dinner at my Mother in law's house. There was so much yummy food! I made sure to get up early before we headed out and get a workout in. I haven't told everyone I know about my journey at this point, and it is a bit awkward to measure portions and log what you eat in front of everyone, SO I said it all looked so wonderful I had to take a picture of my plate to remember it! Haha! I pulled out my phone, and took a picture of my plate full of food. Then when not so many people were around, I pulled up the picture of food and logged it into my food journal. Oh boy I thought I was clever!

The day after Thanksgiving there was another family event to which we were taken out to dinner to an all you can eat buffet of all places. Again, kind of a nightmare to watch calories, but I made sure to load up on plenty of leafy greens, light on the dressing and actually kept within calories both Thanksgiving and the day after!

Of course that couldn't be the end of it. Holiday weeks are hard! The Saturday after was an extended family Christmas party (of course with dinner served) then we headed even farther out of town and stayed the rest of the weekend with some friends. The nice part about life long friends is they have known you your whole life! I was so much more comfortable just saying, "Hey- let me log your recipe in My Fitness Pal while you make it so I know what I'm eating."  Same friend went on a super walk with me that evening. She has a great walking trail right behind her house and of course lots and lots of hills! It really makes things go smoother and easier when you have someone close that supports you 100%. I am truly blessed for having the people in my life that I do.

Now of course on to the weigh in! How did I do???? Take a look....

Numbers you say? My second weigh in I weighed in at 288 pounds. That is a 14.6 loss my friends! Woot woot! All over a holiday! I have to admit I was/am a bit proud of myself for that one! Despite circumstances we still have our choices and ways to deal! Here's to hoping you all have some good weigh ins too! Any loss is a loss! Celebrate it!

Haters Gonna Hate

When I was in middle school (Jr. High), I was on the volleyball team. I remember one day in particular when we were at a tournament. After our last game, our team hit the locker room to change to go home. A girl on my team said loud for all to hear, "You know, I use to feel sorry for you because you are fat, but then I realized that you can change that. Now I just feel sorry for you because I know your parents will never have enough money to change your face." It didn't feel good, and I held onto it for years.

Skip forward. I remember talking to one of my best friends about trying to lose weight. I was excited as always about the possibilities of who I could become. She had a particular look on her face and I simply stopped and said, "What?" She grinned and chuckled then said, "I just can't picture it. You would look so WEIRD as a NORMAL sized person!" Not meaning to hurt me, but again held onto that for years.

Present Day. The end of the first week of this journey I had to go to work on a Saturday. We were changing some offices around and I needed to be present. I didn't have to smell or look good to help with manual labor, so I decided to get a little extra exercise in.  I pulled out my bike, put on my helmet, and headed for work. It's been a while since I've felt that cool breeze on my face, or what it was like to "coast" down a hill. I haven't biked for YEARS. I took as many back roads as possible, but inevitably had to go down some pretty populated streets to get to work. I was biking down McKinley street headed to the main road when I spotted them. There were two guys at the edge of the road loading the back of one of their Toyota trucks with what appeared to be moving items. Apparently they thought a person with a helmet cannot hear. As I approached them I saw one elbow the other and motion his head toward me saying, "Dude, check out the fat chick on the bike." They were literally feet away from me, but I waited until I was passing right next to them to look them in the eye and say, "Good for me! Right?!?" They were mortified. It was hilarious.

Present Day Again. A couple weeks after my second weigh in (next post will reveal second weigh in, promise), we had a work Christmas Party. I was feeling pretty good about the weight I had lost and decided I deserved a new sweater to wear to the party. I went to one of my favorite stores that has a plus size section that is still cute clothes. (I have no idea why most places think fat people have horrible taste as well.) Mind you it was the holiday season, so I could have been there shopping for loved ones instead of myself. I was in the store about ten seconds and had gone straight to a cute shirt that had some texture. As I mingled the sleeve through my fingers a young sales associate practically sprinted toward me saying, "MA'AM! (finally got to me) Ma'am, have you been in the store since we've changed things?" With a slightly confused look, I replied I hadn't. "Well, we rearranged the store and moved the plus size section over there (pointing). I just wanted to make sure you were in the right section before you started shopping." Yeah.... nothing was going to look good on me at that point. I went to the plus sized section, tried a couple things on, but left empty handed. I did, however, leave smiling. I thought, "What a pleasant little naive way of telling me how far I still have to come. Don't stop Julie. You have lost some good weight, but don't stop. You got this."

Two stories from the past, two stories from current day. What's the difference?

I am far from wise, but like to think I've learned a few things throughout life. It has taken me SO LONG to understand one simple thing: NO ONE understands YOUR journey better than yourself. Not your family, your friends, and certainly not ignorant strangers. You alone know how you feel, your accomplishments and what you have in you to achieve your goals. I've learned that I need to be my own cheerleader and my own best friend. It seems to me when we care about what others say, that really it is because we are seeking validation from them. Why on EARTH would you seek validation from someone that does not fully understand your journey and what you feel? They can have similar experiences, but even with trying to explain yourself over and over again, and even with all the other person's experiences, the best we can do is empathize with another. The only person we need to seek validation from is ourselves. Are you happy with the effort that you've put in? Do you think the good choices outweigh the bad in your journey? (We all make bad choices, don't think I don't know :) ).

Taylor Swift had it right. Haters gonna hate, but Shake it Off! They don't matter. They don't understand. We matter, and we understand. Shake it off, jump it off, run it off, brush it off! You have got this! You are an amazing human being. It really always amazing me what people can do. The possibilities are endless. I am not a person that lets others tell me what I can and can't do, what I can and can't accomplish. Enjoy and join the journey!

To watch or listen to Taylor Swift's "Shake it Off" click here! Get your jam on!

Day One

Well folks. We have all been there- the moment you realize that you want to improve yourself and make some changes in your life. That moment came for me the week before Thanksgiving 2014.

I've never been a person who can be told what I can and can't do. I wholeheartedly believe that we as people can do ANYTHING we put our minds to. It is only our minds that limit our capabilities. I get fired up when people come to conclusions about me and my capabilities without actually knowing who I am. This happens a lot in my current circumstance. What circumstance is that? I'm obese. Because I am obese, people make assumptions. They assume I am sad. They assume I hate myself. They assume that I am not athletic or I don't care to be. They assume I'm lazy. The assumptions go on and on and on my friends. I'm here to tell you- it is not our place to pass judgments on others, especially when we haven't lived their lives and we don't know what makes them tick.

There are a lot of things I don't like about myself. I would say that it is safe to say that everyone has things they would change. I've been sad, I've hated circumstances, but I love myself. I know without a doubt that I am super! I'm awesome, someone to be loved, and even admired. I read a quote a while back that made me ponder and agree- "Most strong people are not a product of an easy story." I hope to touch on a little of my story in this blog and even inspire others so they can stand up for who they truly know they are and make some positive changes in their lives for themselves, just like I'm working on making positive changes for myself.

The day I decided it was time to start these changes probably could have been chosen better! It was the Saturday before Thanksgiving 2014. I tend to be a bit of an addict of the scale (though some think that overweight people don't care). I remember getting on the scale and texting a friend of mine that it was time to start. I thought if I could do it even through the holidays to start, when the New Year came, it can only get easier!  I went to my friends home and we discussed what I wanted to do and be, along with the motives of doing it. We weighed me in for my "first" weigh in. My all time heaviest I have ever been.

302.6- That's right. Whereas I am not proud of it, I know that it represents a start. There is hope of things to come, and that they can only get better! I know that this blog is a little delayed on time, it gives me a little space to contemplate the changes going on and what I can pull out of it to inspire myself and others, but I invite anyone who reads this to join a journey with me. Maybe I will catch it up to present day. Whatever goals you have that make you want to make changes, whatever accomplishments you want to acheive- whatever your deepest desire... join me.  I'm here to tell you, you can do it. I know I can. Do you know YOU can?

Until next post- here are my AWESOME before pictures! I weigh in officially every two weeks- Becoming not so focused on the scale, but taking time to focus on my choices and myself. There may not be a picture every time, but I will try!

                        

So here I am! First weigh in, and only good things to come! Good luck in your journey as I hope you can wish me luck with mine!